Huts so good…

So many people that are starting in BDSM talk about being a “pain slut”, but there is so much more to being a masochistic pain slut than just enjoying a spanking.

I have the pleasure of both being a pain- loving masochist and playing with one. I love both sides of that coin and there is so much more to learn as I grow in my life as a sweet sadist.

I loved the way the cold metal of the cuffs bit into her wrists, watching as her eyelids grew heavy while her breathes quietly came in small gasps. I loved the way her body shivered slightly as she anticipated the next blow of leather against her sweet sweaty skin

My clit tingled as I watched her tongue dart from her pretty little mouth to taste the tear that touched her lip. That sweet salty intoxicating taste of pain that wrapped her body up in heaven.

I heard her gasp louder as she heard my whip rise up and watched her body twitch as she felt the wind just a fraction of a second before it’s leather fangs sunk into her delicate soft skin.

My cunt became soaking wet as her head fell back, her body swayed at the force of my whip, and her mouth opened wide in a silent scream. I wanted to hurt her more as her body surrendered to the molten burn of my whip and she started begging for more.

I stood back and watched with immense pleasure as her body slumped against it’s bindings and her my flew freely into subspace. She looked so stunning as her eyes fluttered under their closed lids, her tears ran freely down her face and that wicked evil little laugh of hers started, telling me that she was ready to be taken down off of the cross and held till she came back down to earth in my arms.

I was in heaven holding her and she, she is my sweet true masochist that feeds every evil part of my soul.

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Intensely 

I’ve known since little girl I’ve always been intense.

This last year has shown me that sometimes it’s okay to stop being so intense, mostly these last few days.

I have been learning alot about myself,  not all because I wanted to but because I want this relationship, these friendships, and my path that I am on right now to continue in the right ways. 

I love in full, I have always believed in the fairy tales of how when you fall in love you feel complete and “the one” will want to be with you as much as you want to be with them.

 I could never understand why relationships didn’t work for me, why each one that ended badly left me scared to try the new one on.

 I could never understand why relationships that did work longer were with married men who wanted to own me but also wanted me to go see others. 

Those relationships ended because I fell too hard and craved more attention,  but didn’t know then what I am learning from my bf now- that the attention I crave can and should come from me 1st. 

Why does learning have to hurt so much sometimes? 

To hear him be honest with me about not missing me as much as I miss him brought back memories of Larry telling me that he needed to end our affair because I was in too deep and that I gave up my own fun life to be available for him whenever.  I thought that is what one did as a girlfriend but also as a submissive.  Yes, it hurt hearing that but yet – made me want to spend sometime figuring out why I felt like I missed him so much, I mean- I don’t want a full time live in lover, I want this, I want the freedom this relationship gives me.  

Think when I say I miss him it isn’t me saying I want him around all the time not living his own life, or saying that I don’t feel connected to him, it is I miss the connection we have when we are alone together, laughing, going to the movies, kissing, and having amazing sex.  I guess what I should say next time I want to say that is what I miss doing or want to do again.  Instead of I miss you – I want to hold your hand at the movies again when we can please. 

I do not want to have history keep repeating itself in order for me learn and improve. I started down that path again and this week really opened my eyes. 

I want him to miss me when we can’t see each other,  but not because I keep telling him I love and miss him; I want him to want me in his life, but not because I act like I can’t live without him, but because I know that I can.  That I know I am not entitled to anyone’s time or feelings, but that I do love getting to be part of them. 

So where do I go from here? 

I learn that my love doesn’t lessen any by flirting and seeing others, it didn’t in the beginning of this relationship so why would it now? actually it seems to make it deeper because I get out of the mind set that he is “be all”  and I give the poor man a break from all the pressures of dating me when I am being needy and clingy.  That is a good thing. 

But I also learn and remember that giving both of us space is a good thing. He isn’t Paul, he doesn’t need to know my every thought or every little thing I am doing, but at the same time he is my Maestre, and I take that part very seriously,  so I do still want to clear things with him, I want him to have the power of some decisions in my life as my Dom. and there is the fine line I am learning to walk. 

I have a feeling a good sit down discussion is needed again so I can better understand that line of Dom/sub and Boyfriend/girlfriend because I want them to work for the both of us, both as partners and as separate people again. I love being with him and having him in my life. 

I don’t want to lose him as either of those things in my life and I don’t want to lose the person I am becoming so growth is necessary…. Yet again lol, but I love this life so it is worth all the growing pains 

Master’s new toy.

I was halfway through my shift of teasing and pleasing my lovely callers
at my phone job, when Master called me to say I needed to come directly to his house right after my fun times were done, that I was not to ask why,-just to get there.

Walking up to his house, I heard his other submissive giggling with
another girl, a voice I had never heard before. They were in the shed so I
walked in and introduced myself. It turned out that this new lady was
going to be Master’s new toy and she was really nice, we laughed and
giggled while getting to know each other better.

My sub-sister had the rope in her hand as she was told to have ready but
as we all started giggle, one of us thought it would be a good idea to tie
her up and have her ready for him when he came home, one of the worst
idea’s yet.

Master was smiling when he walked into the shed but that smile dropped when he saw what we had done without permission. He got the most feral look on his face as he wrapped his hand around my throat and growled that he was not happy with us.

We were quickly banished from the shed.

It was so hard having to walk away without getting to be with him tonight
while he played, but this was our punishment and we deserved it.

We looked back to see if maybe he would tell us to stay, but that did not happen.

It was with tears in our eyes as we walked to the house as we heard the
first hit of leather on her skin. We laid in bed cuddled up together as we
heard her start to moan, knowing that Master had started the second part of his playtime.

The waves of emotions rushed over me as I heard her giggle, I knew I
should be so happy for Master because I know how much he loves his playtime and I really was happy for both him and her, but at the same time that tinge of pain knowing that Master was enjoying someone else, hurt.

This was the first time I experienced this and I swore that I would deal
with the emotions with him honestly so that next time I will wait to do as
asked and will be able to even be happier for Master and his new toy,
because I really liked her and I love him.

Master came into the room later that night, stood before us looking at us
both for a few moments before tell us to move our asses over, he was tired and wanted his ladies wrapped around him right where we good girls belonged and would always be.

It felt so good to be wrapped up in his arms, to feel him hug her and then
me; to hear him kiss her forehead before he turned to me, looked me in the eyes and said “I love you too little one, now get out of your head and
get your ass to sleep.I promise to punish you properly in the morning my
good girl” before kissing my forehead as well.

Love..

Love takes so many different forms

Love isn’t just a wonderful prince riding in to rescue a beautiful helpless maiden that the fairy tales make little girls dream of…

Love is not just the roses and candlelight that the movies make young ladies dream of…

Love is not just the two older people sitting on a couch talking about days gone by that stories from other couples make newlywed couples dream of…

Sometimes love is a touch, it is a kiss, it is a one night spent together sharing your bodies and then nothing more.

Sometimes love is meeting for coffee and then you crave that person in your life, for the rest of your life if possible.

Sometimes love is the sting of leather against soft skin, the hot wax pouring down on a hard nipple, the deep intake of breath when you wrap your hands around her neck as you growl in her ear how you want to tie her up and make her scream your name as you do all the wonderful devious things you have dreamed of doing to her.

Sometimes love is a whisper, a exchange of voices over a phone-line with a beautiful phone sex girl that leaves you breathless.

What is love? It is whatever makes you shine.

Make love to me.

 

Meet me by the door when you come home after a long day at work.

Reach out and stroke my face with your fingertips before sliding your hand
around to the back of my neck to wrap in my hair as your other hand
reaches out to wrap around my throat.

Squeeze it tightly, you know how that puts me right into a wild
submissive state and you can already smell my body surrendering to your
desires.

Slide your mouth gently over my collarbone, graze it with your teeth.
Bring your lips up to my ear, whisper softly “tonight, you are all mine
bitch.”

Walk me into the bedroom, stand me there as you slowly take off my
clothes. Kissing each part of my skin as it is revealed to you. Take my
shoulders and push me down onto the bed so that your cock is even with my
mouth.

Lift my chin up with your fingers and smile at me as you slowly guide you
that gorgeous cock into my lips. Stand there and enjoy your own personal
slut as I worship your cock with my red lips and hot wet mouth.

Just as I am about to cum from from pleasing you, reach back to pull my
head back by my hair and tell me to lay back on that soft bed.

Run your fingertips down my body slowly, stopping every once in a while to
kiss where you touched.

Part my legs gently and run your tongue along my lips until I am begging
to please please taste me, at that moment dive in and eat this pussy like
it is your last meal on earth.

Own this clit with your teeth as your fingers start to enter me, look up
and see my eyes roll in the back of my head as my legs start to shake, my
ass tightens and I coat your face with my cum.

Smile down at me as you slide up my body and then side your cock deep
inside of my still clenching cunt. Moan as I start to lick my juices off
of your lips and then say no.

One hand holding my wrists down, one hand wrapped tightly around my
throat, you look down at me as you are deeply thrusting inside of me.
Stare at me as you growl out “Mine” and feel me cum once again even harder
all over your cock, balls, and thighs.

Hold me down tight as your words throw me over the edge, repeating then as
I scream out and ride the most intense orgasm of the night. Growl “Mine”
again right before you lean down to leave your bitemark deep on my chest
and cum deep in of me.

Hold me close as my eyes slide shut and whisper in my ear that you love me
as I drift off to sleep. Promise me next time you will mark every inch of
my body as yours with your belt and kiss me before tucking me in tightly
and leaving the bedroom.

I so adore you and every touch you leave on my skin.

A doll’s life too

Oh my gosh, such a beautiful better day today. 

I got my positive groove back!!! 

A few days ago I posted a blog about my gbaby’s dolls and how they kinda twisted me up, but our darling boyfriend reminded me that not all growth and life changes are bad. 

Maybe Ms. Dark haired barbie decided to branch out and go explore poly knowing that she is loved deeply by the blondes and has a safe home base with a loving couple.  Maybe she is just out visiting different swinger parties and dungeons like she used to in the past. 

Or maybe she is just busy setting up her new place and getting it ready for more fun date nights with a hot sexy man that makes her scream in delight, cry in peace, giggle in enjoyment, and makes her use her brain till it hurts. (believe me, she is so happy that there are others that meet his wide array of needs because owie!!)  

Or maybe, just maybe, they are just damn barbie dolls and my gbaby prefers blondes lol 

Boobs!!!! 

Oh what wonderful things they are! 

They come in so many sizes and types, some like to be sucked on gently, some like to feel that suction all the way down to their belly button!!! 

Some you can nibble on and others beg for you to bite them till the person is cumming down their legs!!! 

From light rope bondage to the extreme, hot wax running down the side in torrents to freezing ing ice cube trails, the sting of a riding crop to the gentle stroke of a feather, the sharp intense pain of teeth deeply marking property to the gentle sweep of soft butterfly kisses teasing their skin- oh all of the wonder things you can do to breasts. 

Even the hardest core pain slut I know cries out in torture when you look her in the eyes while you slide your tongue gently and softly around her nipple, smiling as you gently run your teeth over her erect hard little sensitive nipple. She shivers and shakes as thrills run down her body because she knows you truly see her, you see her as a thing of beauty and slowly torture her tits with soft touches and gentle kisses making her ride the wave of subspace but never letting her dip into it, keeping her present for all the lovely things you are going to do to those magnificent breasts. 

But, I also have the pleasure of knowing one of the sweetest ladies around that you would just like to cuddle with and baby, but inside of this woman beats the heart of a primal animal. 

She can tear you up when unleashed. Push her up against the wall, wrap your hand around her throat, rip her shirt open and you can start to see her chest heave, her eyes start to stare at you intensity as if to say “game on.” Oh that is when it really becomes delightful, you can practically feel the waves of desire rolling through her. 

You can’t help but pull back,  rip that bra off,  grab those tits in your hands and squeeze them as if your life depends on it. That’s when you can see her throw her head back close her eyes for a quick second before leveling her glaze back to your eyes. 

Challenge accepted and you better be ready, because once this passes she is going to be giggling like that sweet little again and it will be up to you to walk her through it all. But right now, you just want to hurt her; she wants you to hurt her because she knows you understand that you are one of the very few that gets to see her this way and she trusts you with her life. 

Her tits are amazing, they take that 1st slap so well, they bounce and jiggle like they are tempting you to hit them harder and you do, you can’t help but to beat them until she has cum running down her legs, tears running down her face and she is begging you with her eyes to own her. To take her over that ledge and let her fly.  Her beautiful breasts are an angry shade of red, her body squirming to be touched, and her lips whispering “thank you” or “I love you” over and over again while she is lost in her own little world and her body is completely yours. 

You hit them one time as you growl in her ear that she is yours and hang on as she leaps over that mental wall and is flying. She giggles back to life laying in your bed with your arms wrapped gently around her and your fingertips caressing her firm yet supple boobs while she floats back down to earth. 

There is just something magical about a beautiful set of gorgeous tits. And the best part, no two sets are the same!!! There are big ones, little ones, full and flabby or tiny and perky. They are all such a treat to get to play with. 

I used to worry about my larger “flabbier” ones because they are as cute and perky/full and firm as others, but they are amazing in their own way and look hot as fuck all tied up in a rope harness!!! 

So here is to the joy off all things boobie!!! They are awesome!!